Friday, April 30, 2010

Friday forte: seven years ago .....

seven years ago ....., originally uploaded by ebbandflo_pomomama.

It's a bit of a weird friday forte posting today - my head is with the memories of seven years ago (I would have been asleep back in 2003, epidural in place and catching up on some rest before the grand arrival). In the next room the Wee Guy is fighting sleep right now as he's too excited about tomorrow - seven seems to be a really exciting and aware age.
The picture above, our blissful lack of awareness tinged with uncertainty about the future as we spend one of our last evenings alone together in a pre-parental existence seems hard to recollect.
What exactly was life like before we had a family of our own?
I myself feel that the last seven years has been a time of incredible growth for me, where I've truly become the adult who realises there's still a lot of growing up to do.
Life has changed so much for me that it's hard to remember a time before ... before I had a near-constant little shadow around me all the time. As someone who relishes her personal space and frequently seeks solitude, motherhood has been a huge voyage of discovery for me. Within limits, I've found that I really do enjoy my son's company and that he does add value to my daily life. He's taught me what it is to share life, living with another person rather than just sharing living space. He's as much the teacher as I am. I will admit though that it's all been a necessary change, not optional but imperative, for survival as a mother/child unit. I don't think we do too badly (thinks back to cupcakes at the mall this afternoon!).
As for the other sitters in the photograph; well, sadly Mauz the cat (furry bum on the right) had to be euthanased three months after the Wee guy came home to us. He had thyroid disease and kidney failure, but before he left us he truly welcomed our new addition. I have some lovely pics of the two together.
And the human, the soon-to-be new dad? How has he fared? He's come up trumps with the new responsibilities thrust on him as sole breadwinner and co-parent. As I talk to other (younger) mums I realise how much more he does in terms of spreading the load at home and how lucky I am. He's as fully capable of taking charge of the childcare for an entire weekend as he is of cleaning the bathrooms or planning the meals (which he does every weekend). He doesn't expect to disappear taking "time off" on Saturdays and Sundays for "working all week" which some dads do (what the f*ck do you think your child(ren)'s mother has been doing then?) and he doesn't see staying at home in the evening as babysitting. Although I don't think he's done as much growing up as I have and, rather irritatingly, he still views childcare arrangements as totally my responsibility, I am still impressed at how involved a father he actually is day-to-day. ......... and at how much more hair he's lost in the process :)


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