Saturday, August 28, 2010

friday forte: halfway thru?

i've decided to declare my 45th birthday a halfway point of some sort.

it seems kind of midlife-ish; my great grandmother lived till she was 93y so i feel almost halfway there.
my mid-life crisis is hopefully sliding down the other side of the hill towards graceful acceptance, so maybe it's peaked and i can get on with living once more.
i've cast off certain expectations, found i can relax and let go to enjoy myself - maybe this is maturity?
but i also feel as though i can still be passionate enough and interested in what's going on around me to still hold an opinion - maybe this is maturity too?

anyway, and in summary, i no longer feel like i'm staring down a steep and utter descent into darkness.
i don't feel so much that it's all too late and there's not much i can do about forging my own path in life.
i still feel nervous, and i still feel as if i really shouldn't waste another moment.
but i don't feel quite so un-guided.
i feel hopeful.
i think i may have an inkling of a route map.

i think it's about bloody time!

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